Suffering Well-- Part 2: A Man Like Joseph

There is a man named Jacob whose family was one hot mess. To start with he had fallen in love with a woman and worked seven years to marry her. But his father-in-law substituted his older daughter for the bride and he had to work another seven years for the one he loved. For several years the loved was barren and the unloved wife was birthing sons to earn love. Eventually there were twelve sons in all--two from the loved and 10 from the unloved.

So the family had two wives vying for one man's affection and Jacob who himself made some serious parenting mistakes. He loved one son, Joseph, more than his other sons and he made him a colorful coat, conveying his favoritism. Second, when Jacob sent his older sons out to tend sheep, he sent
Joseph to check on them and the reports he gave Jacob weren't always favorable and who likes a  tattle tale?.

Then there was a matter of dreams. God gave Joseph dreams, indicating his brothers would all bow in submission to him. Being 17, he did what teens would do--he bragged. In the midst of a family with two wives competing, a dad with rotten parenting skills, a son prone to bragging, and slew of sinful natures smoldering, the sibling rivalry grew into a great big, ugly hatred. 

After the coat giving, the dream bragging, and the hatred growing, Jacob sent Joseph once again to check on his brothers. When they saw him coming, they plotted to kill him and planned to tell their dad he was killed by an animal. But one brother with a smidgen  of integrity left suggested they  throw him in a pit instead. When Joseph arrived, they stripped him of his identity as the favored one when they stole his coat. They threw him into a pit and sat down to eat, which showed just how hard their hearts had become and how deeply rooted their hatred was When a caravan traveling to Egypt came, they pulled Joseph from the pit and sold him as a slave, showing his bloodied coat to their dad and Jacob grieved the grief parents grieve on losing a child.

That seems like enough hurt for one person to go through for a lifetime. But, there was more suffering in the story God penned. Joseph was bought by Potiphar, the captain of the guard and  Potiphar realized God was with Joseph and put him over his whole house. Potiphar's wife tries to seduce him and he runs away as she grabs his outer garment. Angered by  rejection,  she claimed he  attacked her and her lie lands Joseph in prison. He rose to leadership in the prison and ruled with integrity over other prisoners. Two prisoners dreamed dreams Joseph interpreted. One was released and promised to remember him, but didn't. Not until Pharaoh dreamed dreams no one in Egypt could  interpret. The freed prisoner tells about Joseph and Joseph is summoned to interprets the dreams that revealed seven years of plenty would be followed by seven years of famine. Pharaoh makes Joseph a ruler and tells him to prepare Egypt for the famine and he does.

As I read, I wished the story were written by a woman because a woman would have told us what Joseph thought and what he felt. But the story makes Joseph seem super human. Initially, we aren't told about his grief and I wonder if his grief  was overshadowed by his need to survive. We aren't told about anger that would kindle in a human heart betrayed by one's own flesh, that was falsely accused of rape, and that was forgotten and left in prison. Maybe it was because he focused on the steadfast love of God and His blessings that were poured out on him in each circumstance he faced.

As a human, Joseph had choices to make. He could put his eyes on the injustices he experienced and the suffering he endured or He could put them on God who was at work in His life. He could choose to focus on people who did him wrong and grow a hatred of his own or he could focus on God who is sovereign and in control of what appeared a mess. He could choose to lie in bed at night and plot the revenge his brothers deserved or allow God to fill him with peace and grace freeing him to be who God created him to be. He could focus on the mistakes his dad made, showing favoritism and asking him to tattle or he could choose to forgive. He could focus on his dream-bragging ways and hate himself or he could focus on Gods grace and allow Him to grow humility that could dissipate the pride that had dwelled in his young heart. 

We eventually get a glimpse of the pain Joseph endured. During the famine his brothers knocked on his  door to buy grain. He recognized them, but they didn't know him. Joseph devised a plan to get them to bring his youngest brother to him. When they returned he invited them to a feast. When Joseph saw Benjamin, he was overcome by emotion and ran from the room to weep. When he decided to tell his brothers, he was so overcome with emotion that he wept so loud the whole household of pharaoh heard him. He revealed his identity and his brothers returned home to bring their dad and their families to live in Egypt under Joseph's rule. Joseph extended them grace, telling them what they meant for evil, God meant for good.  

There are several things we can  take from Joseph's story. First, God's plans will not be thwarted by man's schemes. The brothers bowed to the bother they sold. A modern story that also reflects this truth  is the Jim Elliot and Steve Saint story. God sent them to people as His witness and the people  murdered them. But God wanted these people's hearts and sent their wives and families back and  used them and their grace to win the people's heart. That abuser. That user. That slanderer. That betrayer. That murderer. They cannot stop God's plans.

Second, no matter what circumstances we find ourselves in God is a God who blesses. God blessed Joseph in Egypt. He blessed him in Potiphar's house. He blessed him in prison. When we take our eyes off of our circumstances, off those who wrong us, off those who hate us, off of the disease we have, off the broken relationship that stings, off the job we lost, and put them on God we will be able to see God's blessings.  

Third, God may take us to some places we don't want to go, so He can bless people as He blesses us. Potiphar was blessed. The jailor was blessed. Joseph's family was blessed--all because God blessed Joseph. My friend Mary Esther was taken through a cancer battle with her two year old son and she kept her eyes on Jesus and experienced His blessings daily. As they sat with their son after surgery and through chemo, the medical staff, their friends, their church family also experienced the blessings with which God was blessing them. In addition, someone gave her a journaling Bible and she share the pictures she began drawing during that dark time and her journaling has gone viral. More and more people are being blessed by their story and just as Joseph's trust in God saved people, her trust is showing people the way they can be saved.    

Fourth, there is nothing wrong with grieving losses and expressing pain. Joseph held his pain close until he could contain it no more and he grieved long and hard right in front of this brothers. I have a hunch his pain did a lot more convicting than anger ever could have. His pain, the grief their father experienced, and their fear of retaliation may well have been the chisels God used to soften their stone cold hearts. 

Finally, there is  no offense so big that a heart in the hand of God can't forgive it. Joseph was hated. Joseph was thrown into a pit. Joseph was stripped of his identity. Joseph was taken from the pit only to be sold as a slave. Joseph taken to a foreign land, falsely accused of rape, cast into prison, and forgotten by someone he helped. Yet, he worked hard, rose to power, and saved lives, preserving the line of Jesus.

Suffering well allows God to do his work in us, in our families, in our church, in our community, and even in our nation. Suffering well allows us to experience God's love and blessing even in the hard. Suffering well allows us to see how God works in and through us. Suffering well produces patience, which endurance, which produces hope.

Bearing Burdens

"Bear you one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ…

For every man shall bear his own burden."

Galatians 6:2, 5

Sometimes the Lord is gracious to bring the truth of His word alive to us through life examples. I was fortunate to see one of those life lessons unfold during a youth retreat. I had the privilege of watched Chris Riser, the speaker, interact with his six-year-old son as they did activities together. The biggest lesson came as I watched them climb a rock wall. I was near tears when they finished. The scene of them together reminded me of the above verses as well as the relationship we have with our Abba Father.

Josiah began climbing on the easy part of the wall while his father began climbing on the level next to him. At first, they were even and then the dad slowed down a little and let his son get a little above him. Just as Josiah got too high for the spotters to reach him, Chris scooted over vertically and was just underneath his son. He spoke calmly, gently encouraging his son to reach for the next stone, suggesting which stones to step on and which ones to reach for. With his experience and guidance Josiah was able to successfully climb up the wall. At one point there was a really big stretch for the little guy. His dad stretched his arm to the next rock and told him to step on his arm and reach for the next rock up with his hand. For a brief moment the dad bore the total weight of his child. The rest of the way Josiah did well and was able to pull his own weight in the climb. For a few moments the lower part of Josiah's legs were totally hidden by his dad and it was like they were one unit working together. 

Josiah totally began the climb on his own with just the instruction he was receiving and spotters. He was fully carrying his own weight. Then his dad became his teacher even though Josiah pretty much did most of the work. When he reached the spot that he could not have gotten past, his dad became his strength and even his rock. After that point, he was off and climbing again. That is the way we are to be in the church. We are each responsible for loving and serving other people and bearing our own responsibilities. There are times, however, when we become weak, hurt, or lack the experience we need to handle things and we need someone to come alongside and help us. It may be our friends, a pastor, a mentor, our church, or a Christian counselor. I have realized that if I am doing my "job" as a youth worker correctly, there will comes a time I am no longer needed. Chris only gave Josiah what was needed so he would gain experience and become stronger and more independent in rock climbing. Sometimes he was quiet, sometimes instructing, and sometimes he was Josiah's strength. He didn't baby him, nor did he leave him to fail. 

The other picture I saw in Chris and Josiah's relationship is that he learned a lot about God from His dad. Chris loves rock climbing and does it well. He invited Josiah to start learning it and Josiah took him up on it. Watching Chris on the wall, I realized he had a perspective of the whole wall that Josiah did not have at six years old. He was very calm and would lean back a little and scan the wall and convey to Josiah what he needed to do. He also knew his son and knew what his strengths and weaknesses were and he encouraged him without making him feel like a "loser." If he lost his footing, he guided him so his foot was back on course. The amazing thing was that Josiah listened carefully, trusted his father's advice, and obeyed his instructions. Their relationship is a picture of the way God relates to us and it is a picture of how we should we should respond to God. He has a complete perspective of our lives while we only see the little "rocks" or lack of “rocks” ahead of us. Through His word and His Spirit He guides us through life if we listen like Josiah did. We,too,  will be safe if we choose to obey God's voice. When we are weak, He offers us His strength.

Through the community of the church He provides people who help bear burdens that are too heavy for us. We need to listen and obey God like Josiah did. We may need to allow others in on our struggles and let them come along side of us and encourage us with God's truth. When we can admit our fear and our need for guidance, others can impart their courage and wisdom into our hearts. When we are struggling we need to let them hold us accountable. We also need to listen to godly people who speak His truth with open hearts. God is like Chris in that He is upholding us in this life and is our rock when there is nothing to stand on. Even more evident in Chris and Josiah's relationship was love and the fruit that is found in consistent parenting. Several students told me they heard Josiah tell his dad when he thought his dad did a good job on an activity. Josiah had already begun to reflect the loving and encouraging heart of his father. In the same way we should be reflecting our Abba to others by emulating Christ’s example. 

Our heavenly Father loves us and is instructing us -- are we, listening intently? He is our rock -- are we standing on HIM? 

Prayer: Father, thank you for giving us real life examples of your truths. Your word should be our delight and our instruction, please give us ears to hear and hearts to obey. Thank you for your faithfulness to uphold us and keep us from falling. Help us to become people who seek to bless your heart. Amen.

Beautiful Body Parts

"For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do you think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith. If it is serving let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully."
- Romans 12:3-8

Paul begins this passage by telling the Romans to not think more highly of themselves than they should. Paul realized he had been transformed from being a man who hated and tortured believers in the name of God into a missionary who introduced people to Christ. He reminded them and us to realize we are sinners saved by a holy, righteous God because it is His nature to be gracious. It is only because God loved us and has invited us into a relationship with Him that we are His children.

Next, he takes us to a more outward perspective as he reminds us we are all part of the body of Christ – the church. He reminds us the church is made up of many individuals who have different functions within the church. God gives each of us a unique blend of special abilities, passions and desires to do things nobody else can do. He names some of the gifts in this passage (others are found in 1 Corinthians 12). The gifts Paul lists are: prophecy – telling forth the truth according to the word of God, ministering – coming along side of people and helping them, teaching – being able to understand and communicate God's word, exhortation – encouraging people to live lives that are obedient to God's word, giving – the ability to see needs and give to meet those needs, ruling — shepherding or the ability to help believers mature, mercy – the ability to be merciful and forgiving and the ability to come along side of people and help them to live in the light of God's mercy. It is interesting that spiritual gifts flow over into our everyday lives. If we mature and react to a given situation, it is often partly controlled by our spiritual gift. For example, when a child spills his milk the prophet might confront him for his carelessness, the person with the gift of ministry would bend down and help the child clean the mess, the person with the gift of exhortation would try to help him understand what caused the spill, the person who is a teacher would try to discern why the milk was spilled and help the child see what he could do differently, the person who has the gift of mercy would care more about the child's embarrassment and try to alleviate that, and the person with giving would probably replace the milk!

One of the friends with whom I used to do a Bible Study had the Spiritual gift of faith. When we first started meeting it was funny because in her honesty she shared how she could not understand how people had doubts about God. She, from the time she became a Christian, never doubted God, His love, or His sovereign plans for her life. We grew up in very similar family structures and did not experience Christ in our childhood homes. Yet, I love God's word and often wrestle with the truths contained in it before they actually become a part of my heartfelt faith. Every time we met I could show her things from the scripture she hadn't noticed before, because I have grown in my faith by wrestling with what I read in His word and because my gift is teaching. She in turn exhorted me to trust God in the way I never had before. During one of our early studies I encouraged her to give the freedom to let people express doubt so she could see God use her gifts to speak faith into their lives. Oddly, I probably reaped the most benefit of that advice. I could express my doubts to her freely without fear of rejection or admonition. I knew she loved me and accepted me and I was blessed by the encouragement she gave me to trust God. I always walked out of our study together full of hope and a whole new perspective on life. She in turn told me that she felt free to tell me she doesn't know how to say something to someone who doubts and we looked in scripture and found answers. She also asked me for insight into a passage and if it was one that I had struggled through I could give her all the ramifications of what that passage meant in my life. It was a really blessed “body” relationship! 

What are your passions, gifts, and abilities? How do you use them to build up the body? Do you accept other's gifts and view them as important as your own? Do you encourage other people to their gifts? Do you realize how valuable your own gifts are to the body of Christ?

Prayer: Father, thank you for your grace and for taking each of us out of the muck that we use to live in. Thank you for gifting people with special abilities and placing them in the body of Christ as You would. Thank you for the prophets, teachers, helpers, givers, and merciful people You have put in my life. Give each of us the courage and strength and insight to use our abilities and passions in ways that will honor and glorify You. Amen.