Godly Passion

This last year of politics left me feeling a host of unpleasant emotions. Some were caused by the fake news presented as truth and the frustration of trying to discern what was real and what wasn't. Some of the emotions were due to the polarization of the political parties, which in itself could be an awesome system of checks and balances if people listened to one another and wanted what is best for all. Some of them were due to the manipulation tactics used by people to sway voters. Many believed the loudest voice, the crudest words, the most hateful labels, and the most unrelenting gas lighting techniques could create enough fear, obligation, and guilt to sway people to vote for their candidate--qualified or not. Some of it was due to the demonizing of the main players in the political arena. If you believe one side, you believe President Trump is a demon possessed man incapable of doing any good and if you believe the other side, you believe both Obama and Hillary were Satan's cohorts doing his bidding. But when we take off the blinders of misplaced passion we see they are humans who each have both weaknesses and strengths. They are people who have accomplished some good and who have made some serious mistakes and made some poor, sinful choices, just like you and just like me.

Now that the election is over and the new president has taken office, I've been trying to decide how to respond in a godly way to the government we have in place. To be honest, as a survivor, Trump's moral character and objectification of women grieved my heart as did the nation's and the churches varied responses to it. As much as I was bothered by the information that came out during the elections on both sides I realize President Trump is not the worst of the worst and neither was Obama and Hillary. Just think about Pharaoh--he was known for his enslavement and mistreatment of the Jewish nation and the murder of innocent babes. Nebuchadnezzar--he took captive many of Israel's finest young men and attempted to turn their hearts from their God and their homes and to use them for his own purposes. Herod--he was an infamous murderer who ordered the killing of all male children under the age of two in an attempt to thwart the life of Christ, the promised Messiah. Then there was Nero who was known for slaughtering Christians in an attempt to thwart the spread of Christianity and the worship of the King of kings. And then there was Hitler--he attempted to destroy the Jews, encamping, starving, experimenting on, and the mass murdering of Jews and those who gave them refuge.

Because Christ's Kingdom, the church, is not a visible kingdom, I know this world and even this country, as much as I love it, is not my true home. My loyalty and my deepest affections are to lie with Christ and His heavenly Kingdom. In fact, all the hate and the accusations being spewed back and forth have made me long for His return and made me a bit homesick for Home. In a perfect world, we would live in a Theocracy under the rule of a perfect, benevolent King. But that is not the case right now. But, as long as I have breath I am Christ's ambassador, representing Him as I navigate this life in this world. My allegiance, like any other ambassador, lies with the King and the living out of His word as I represent Him here in this world.

To do this and to remain in joy, I realized I need to change my expectations. President Trump isn't the Savior and if I expect him and the ruling party to fully embrace Christian thinking and Christian values, I will live in a constant state of disappointment and dissatisfaction. And I have been afraid that people demanding ruling parties do so don't realize there is danger in demanding that. I was relieved that John Piper expressed that danger, "The linking of the Christian church with the ruling political regimes has more often proven to corrupt the essential spirit of Christ." I think he is right on.

So the question, I wrestle with is, "How do I passionately live this life of ambassadorship?

First, I need to keep in mind my heavenly citizenship and the King I represent. Because of this, I can follow what He has laid out in His word. He has promised that any suffering and discomfort in this present time including suffering under worldly leadership is minute compared to the glory I will experience when I go home. For now I just want to represent Him well and if suffering is a part of that, I want to suffer well so that my life would continue to draw people to Him.

Second, I can pray for the government, asking the Holy Spirit to reveal to officials what righteousness truly looks like and convict them of sin and wrong doing and their need for a Savior. I can pray that God would cause them to be sensitive to His leading and that He would fill them with humility, patience, and godly wisdom. At the same time, I can hold on to the truth of God's Word and remember God's providence has always ruled and continues to rule over the ungodly kings of this earth. He has and still can use even the most rebellious rulers to fulfill His purposes. He sets them up, He takes them down, and He turns them around. Their hearts are like flowing waters in His hands. I can rest in the fact that God is always good and that ungodly leaders who believe they are in control cannot ever negate His goodness and His sovereignty.

Third, regardless of the person(s) in office, I can demonstrate godly respect towards the positions they bear and obedience to Christ at the same time. I can maintain values consistent with my faith just as Joseph did when He was sold into slavery by his brothers. I can remain faithful to God, always keeping in mind that my identity is in Christ and humbly and assertively relate to those over me just as Daniel, Shadrach, Meshack, and Abednego did while living captive in Persia.

Fourth, I can choose to remember my true calling is to worship God and to love others well no matter what is going on around me. I can pray and look for opportunities to serve, support, and witness to people from every economic class, every ethnic people group, and every educational background because I know with out a doubt that it is God's will that His church be a beautiful blend of diverse people united by a common faith in an awe inspiring God. It is His desire we love each other well and keep ourselves unstained by the corruption is in this world. I can choose to walk in the joy that comes from knowing Him and having the greatest message to share.

Fifth, though President Trump's character leaves something to be desired, I refuse to worry and to complain about every nuance of His presidency. I refuse to look at him as either all good or all bad. I refuse to buy into the lie that I am powerless over the next 4-8 years because I find both love and prayer to be empowering. I refuse to buy into the passion turned hate of so many that tends to drain the soul of energy. I prefer to have His passion--the life-giving passion that drove Christ to sacrifice His life for me--be the passion that fills and energizes the soul. I prefer to have His passion driving me to my knees, driving me to share the gospel, driving me to love well, and driving me to to serve the wounded women God brings our way so that their stories can be redeemed and they can walk in godly passion, loving well, experiencing unexplainable, uncontainable, and unimaginable joy that comes from trusting in a merciful, gracious God.

Shame and Unquenchable Thirst

When I began dealing with pain of my past, I came face to face with a core of shame that ran deep, That core explained why, as a believer, I had struggled with the desperate desire to experience deep connection with God while, at the same time, trying to hide parts of myself from Him. I knew I believed and belonged to Him, but I was plagued with fear that if He really knew me He would realize what a mistake it was to extend grace to a mess like me. I had a lot of knowledge about God and could always believe His promises for others, but often wondered if He could or would fulfill them for me and in me. This fear and doubt stemmed from that core of shame that had taken root from an early age. The core that led me to believe I was a bunch of  "toos"-- --too dirty, too bad, too stupid, too needy, too messy, too weak, too defective, too invisible, and too inadequate, each "too" hidden by a great big smile. It also left me wondering if I could be loved the way I knew God loves others. Over the next few weeks I want to share some of how I began to heal shame that is no longer mine to claim.

First, I found someone safe to share about the things that caused my shame to take root. I learned to recognize and acknowledged it as well as the lies that formed its roots. Next, I began to believe there was value in stories--both His story and mine and the relationship between the two. As I did that I began to view my story as a redemption story instead of resenting that it wasn't a perfect fairy tale. That helped me begin to accept both the positive and the negative I had lived. It helped me accept both my weaknesses and strengths and to embrace a life made messy by being in the process of sanctification instead of striving for perfection. I became more comfortable with the confusion of living in a fallen world while I desperately longed for the beauty of heaven untouched by sin. I began to believe that the hard wasn't an indication of a lack of power or love on Jesus' part any more that it was proof that I was beyond redemption.

I also developed a strong curiosity about how God relates to His people and began reading about His encounters with people in both the Old and New Testaments. I read more carefully and meditated on the stories, penning questions and thoughts as I went. I realized people in the Bible were not super heroes, they were simple humans like me--humans that sinned, humans that felt, humans that struggled. So, I tried to put myself in their shoes so I could connect with their stories at a heart level. My view of God and my relationship with Him began to evolve from a fear base to a love based one.

Over the next few weeks I will share what I learned from some of the stories. The first story is found in John 4. It's the story of Christ's encounter with a Samaritan woman. I learned Jewish leaders at that time avoided Samaria because they despised the mixed race that had grown out of the Assyrian captivity, But, Jesus! He wasn't like other religious leaders. He entered Samaria and stopped beside a well to rest because He knew a very thirsty soul was in need. He watched as one lone woman approach the well during the hottest part of day--a time in which she could avoid others who came to draw water as well. I imagine her approaching the well with purpose in her step, hoping to get her water and quickly leave. I also imagine her growing more cautious as she realized He was sitting there.

He surprised her when He asked her to give Him a drink and she responded by pointing out the obvious culture breaches, knowing full well He, as a Jew, would not want to drink from the vessel of an unclean, Samaritan woman like her. Surprisingly He continues to respectfully dialogue with her, pointing out that she didn't know who He was, didn't know that He was offering her living water, and that she didn't understand how she could receive it. I love that Jesus never memorized a script. He presented truth in terms familiar to each. He knew she came to the well physically thirsty and He used that thirst to expose deeper thirsts of her heart. She tried to keep the conversation where it felt safe, so it didn't stir up painful longings, didn't expose her unmet needs, and allowed her to keep her secrets well hidden.

But He knew! He knew He had what she needed most. So, He continued to steer the conversation to the real and to the spiritual. He asked her to bring her husband. It seemed like an odd request, but I imagine with her history her eyes dropped and her voice either softened or bristled depending on which contempt she used to silence her shame.

But He knew that the truth she needed to face was in the words she didn't speak and He used that truth to draw the surface her painful, unrequited thirsts of the soul. He gently acknowledged she was right in saying she didn't have a husband, and let her know she had five husbands and was now living with a man to whom she wasn't married.

He knew! He knew that a woman married five times was looking for someone to fill soul-thirst. But each marriage she entered was like drinking caffeinated drinks to dowse physical thirst. No man, could meet all the unmet needs of childhood and the failed marriages before him.

He knew! He knew that she was living with a heart deeply wounded by the humiliation and shame of rejection that comes with being drug to the town and declared an unfit wife. He knew with each rejection she suffered, her soul had grown more thirsty. He knew with each rejection, parts of her heart grew calloused. He knew with each rejection the belief that she wasn't enough dug itself deeper into the core of her being, causing her to doubt but unable to totally kill the longings. He knew she was a woman whose physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual needs were crying out to be met and He saw her and He heard the cries of her heart.

Through the discourse, her knowledge of Him grew from being a  Jew, to a prophet, to the Messiah. And the words He said to her had to be balm to a thirsty soul: "Believe me, woman, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem...Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks." I can't imagine the power those words held for her. By those words He included her and told her she is sought by the Father--she, the woman, the Samaritan, the ostracized, the defective, the inadequate, the unloved, the invisible, the abandoned is being sought by Jehovah.  

Her encounter with Jesus changed her. She left her water jar in the dust, going to the very people she avoided by her noontime water runs. She told them about Jesus and invited them to come and see for themselves if He was the Messiah. The painful hard the woman had endured and the painful hard the community experienced as a mixed-race culture, rejected and scorned, had given them a soul thirst so deep they knew only the Messiah could quench it. Many of the Samaritans of that community came to know Jesus was the Savior of the world!

There is never a thirst so deep Jesus can't fill it, but we often have to come to the end of ourselves to fully believe and embrace this truth. I also know there is never a shame that can run so deep that the Spirit of God and His truth can't dissolve it, replacing it with pure joy. For when the King of kings seeks us and then meets us by the wells we have dug in an attempt to quench our parched souls, we can finally drop all the pesky "toos" and know that by His blood we have been accepted, made whole, and declared good enough.

God Meets us in the Buts

"But God, being rich in mercy,

because of the great love with which He loved us,"

Ephesians 2:4

 

  

Yesterday I heard a sermon on Ephesians 2:1-10 and when we got to the verse above and I saw the words "But God" and what followed I got so excited that it was all I could do to sit there. I realized that "But God" is a theme that has run through my life. I looked up a few verses that have some form of the words in them and it seems that it is often during the darkest times that these words appear as a beacon of hope.

Here are a few of the "But God's" I found:

In Genesis 3 Adam and Eve ate forbidden fruit, entering all men into a state of sin and spiritual deadness. But they were the first to taste the darkness of rebellion and the shame that wells up in our hearts when we choose sin. They made inadequate clothes to cover their shame. So they hid from God when He came near. In verse 9 we find our words, "But the Lord called to man and said to him, "Where are you?"" Adam and Eve feared being found out. They didn't realize God wasn't just coming to confront them, He was coming to open the door of repentance. He was coming to cover their shame through clothes of animal skins, pointing to the blood sacrifice that would ultimately cover their sin, remove their shame, raise them to life, and make a way to the center of His heart. 

In Genesis 7 we find the account of the flood. The world had become so sinful that every thought of man was filled with violence and God judged through a flood, saving only Noah, his family, and the animals He steered to the ark Noah built. It was a sad, terrifying time as the rain fell, the waters killed, and the boat rocked in the violent storm. But we come to Genesis 8:1, "But God remembered Noah and all the beasts, and all the livestock, that were with him in the ark. And God made a wind blow over the earth, and the waters subsided." And a new a covenant given covered by a bow.

The story of Abraham was riddled with "buts." He and barren Sarah lived in a culture that worshiped fertility gods, making life so miserable for them. But God called them out. But God promised them a child. But when Abe lied twice, placing his wife in the hands of men who would have taken her as their own, God intervened. They even tried to insert their own "buts"  into God's plan -- one of them being Sarah's servant having a child for them, but God stepped into the mess and gives them the child He promised. But God in that act showed Himself to be the true God of life.

Then came the deceiver Jacob who ran away from his dishonest father-in-law with his wives, children, and livestock. Laban wasn't a nice man so God intervened. Genesis 31:24 says, "But God came to Laban the Aramean in a dream by night and said to him, "Be careful not to say anything to Jacob, either good or bad."" Jacob was a deceiver, but God redeemed Jacob from his deceiving ways.

Then Joseph was thrown into a pit by his brothers who then fished him and sold him into slavery. His life, at times was bleak and life took some unfair turns. But God sovereignly worked to preserve life and to change Josephs heart. Listen to the words he spoke to the brothers who betrayed him, "So it was not you who sent me here, but God. He has made me a father to Pharaoh, and Lord of all his house and ruler over all the land of Egypt." But God preserved His people through the dejected brother.
 
When Israel no longer had favor with the Egyptians they were forced into brutal slavery. But God heard their cries and through a series of challenges given to Pharaoh through Moses, they were miraculously freed and in defeating their idols God showed Himself to be the one true living God.  

Then later in Ezra 9:9 we see, "For we are slaves. Yet our God has not forsaken us in our slavery, but has extended to us His steadfast love before the kings of Persia, to grant us some reviving to set up the house of our God to repair its ruins, and to give us protection in Judea and Jerusalem."

In a more personal realm the psalmists said in Psalm 73:26, "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." This teaches us to look for the buts in our own lives.

In the midst of idol worship and going after detestable things we have God's "but" delivered through Ezekiel in Ezekiel 37:23,  "They shall not defile themselves any more with their idols and their detestable things, or with any of their transgressions. But I (God) will save them from the backslidings in which they have sinned, and will cleanse them; and they shall be my people, and I will be their God."  

The book of Daniel we have a bunch more "buts." Wise men couldn't interpret dreams, but God enabled Daniel to. His friends were thrown into a fiery furnace, but God was there and delivered them smoke free. Daniel was cast into a den of lions, but God shut their mouths and Daniel lived.  

Moving forward to the darkest hours ever known to man, the son of God was slain and the promised Messiah was laid in a borrowed grave, but God  raised Him on the third day, defeating sin and death.

And in our never ending struggle with sin we have Romans 6:23, "For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God, is eternal life in Christ Jesus"  and Romans 9:16, "So then it depends not on human will or exertion, but on God, who has mercy.  

I love the "buts." My own life is full of the "buts!"
I am a sinner, but God gave me His righteousness.

I was spiritually dead, but God gave me life.

I lived in the passions of the flesh carrying out its desires, but God intervened and now I am controlled by His spiritual, and compelled by godly passions to do His will.

I was alienated from God, but God reconciled me to Himself through Jesus.

I was a child of wrath, but God adopted me and I am now a child of the King.

I was sentenced to die, but God abolished my spiritual death and brought life and immortality to me through Jesus.

I never fit in, but God chose me and made me acceptable and placed me in His family.   .

I was wounded, but God healed me.     

I was insignificant, but God made me an ambassador of His great kingdom. 

I was inadequate, but God gifted me to serve.

I was fearful, but God  filled me with courage.

I was in bondage to sin, but God showed me the way out.

I was stubborn, but God disciplined me in love and softened my heart.  

I have been unfaithful at times, but God has remained faithful and showered me with His grace.

I could go on and on. I don't deserve the buts, but they were God's loving interventions to draw me to the center of His will. I could say a whole lot more about each one of the "buts" as they are a chapter in my story...a story God is penning with His own hand.

I am so thankful for the "buts." They are there ever doing His continuous redemptive work in me, ever drawing me home to His heart.  

A Wee Little Man

Those of us who have been in church for any length of time are familiar with the children's song, "Zacchaeus was a Wee Little Man." It is easy to understand why children would love the song and the the story of Zacchaeus. They can identify with being too small to be able to see every thing they want to see! But this story isn't just for children, it is for adults as well. It tells us about our great God. 

Zacchaeus was a Jewish man who lived in the town of Jericho. He was of tiny stature and in his culture that meant he was overlooked and even looked down upon. In addition he had become a chief tax collector for the Roman government. That added to the contempt his countrymen would have had for him. His peers believed he was doing "dirty work" for the Roman government and treated him as if he were an enemy. In addition, most tax collectors became rich by taking extra taxes from people to pad their own pockets. So, it was likely he had personally robbed them, resulting in his not being liked by most of the Jewish community.

           

Zacchaeus had heard of Jesus, but did not know him personally. He didn't know what he looked like, but was curious about the Jesus everyone was talking about. But, because of his stature he could not see past the crowd. And no one in that crowd would have wanted to make room for him. So, he ran ahead of Jesus and climbed up in a tree and waited for Jesus to come by so he could get a glimpse of Him. When Jesus came, He paused beneath Zacchaeus and looked up and called him by name! It amazed Zacchaeus that Jesus knew his name and where he was perched before He even glanced up. Jesus invited Himself to Zacchaeus' home and Zacchaeus responded by quickly coming down from the tree. He found in Christ a love and an acceptance that he, a despised person, was hungry for. Because of his reputation, it was a while since anyone had made eye contact with him and acknowledged his presence. It had been a long time since he had experienced close fellowship with others in his home. 

As he began to experience Christ's pure love, Zacchaeus realized all of the wealth he accumulated could not satisfy his heart like Jesus could. As a result, he was changed from being a "thief" to being a "giver" and told Christ he would restore what he wrongly took from people fourfold! The crowd criticized Jesus for spending time with Zacchaeus, but Christ did not respond to their criticism directly. Instead He told Zacchaeus, "This day salvation has come to this house, because this man, too, is a son of Abraham. For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost." What a awesome thing for Christ to do! Their enemy was now in the spiritual family. 

What can we learn from story about Zacchaeus? First, we can relate to him if we are really honest. We often feel small and overlooked. For many, that feeling began in childhood. When Mom got on the phone or in a conversation with another adult and wasn't connecting to us as children, we more than likely clamored for attention, interrupting, doing things we weren't supposed to do, or starting fights with siblings because we knew that would get Mom's attention. 

I came across a Michael Card song a few years ago called Underneath the Door. In the song he describes himself as little guy with stubbly little fingers who wanted to get his Dad's attention. But his dad often closed himself off, hiding behind his office door. He would draw his dad pictures and push them under the door. Sometimes he would even stick his little fingers beneath the door as if to say, "This is me, its who I am."  He shared his story with someone and they pointed out that as an adult he still was that little boy wanting to be seen. So often we do feel small and overlooked. We may smile at what we did as children to get the attention we wanted, but we really are just grown up children still desiring to be seen and heard. We may not be tax collectors and we may not do exactly the same things we did as children. However, we have all sorts of ways of dealing with our feelings of insignificance, insecurity, and inferiority. We have ways we deal with feeling unseen, unheard, and, "small." Some of us become hyper critical and shout the faults of others. Some of us turn those feelings inward and we beat ourselves up emotionally, sometimes physically. Some of us become perfectionists, never stopping to rest or enjoy life, people, or God. Some of us  pursue wealth, fame, or popularity only to find it is never enough to allow us to feel fully seen and fully heard. Some of become so independent we deny the need of being seen, heard, or loved is a need written carefully on the heart by the Creator Himself. Some of us may have even stepped on others, trying to climb to the top where we believed we would be noticed, only to find we felt even smaller.     

Second, we can that learn God is a God who seeks out the smallest. We don't have to climb a tree, the corporate ladder, become the favorite child, or scale the tallest peak. Christ seeks us even we are still sinners, while we are still enemies with God, and when others crowd us out, overlook us, refuse to hear us, or simply ignore us.   

Third, just as Jesus knew the wee little man by name, He knows our name. He was the one who ascribed significance to us as He chose to create us, to love us, to die for us, to reveal Himself to us, to call us down from our self-made tree. His great love looks past our visible sins as well as the invisible ones we keep so well hidden and sees who He created us to be. When He calls our name and invites us to know Him, we can either reject Him or we can embrace Him. If we embrace Him, He comes home to our hearts, radically changing our lives.  

When we feel the most lost, the most unseen, the most unheard, and the most unredeemable, that is the very moment Jesus is calling our name. Those feelings were given to us to let us know we have needs--the need to be seen by Him, the need to be known by Him, and the need to be loved by Him. Those needs were designed to drive us to Him who died to exchange our unrighteousness for His righteousness.  

Lastly, our significance is found in Christ and in the gifting He gives us. We want to be sure our biases don't get in the way of our seeking and offering the love of Christ to sinners in need of a loving, life changing God who sees and knows their names. The "tax collectors"--those we might view as enemies, those we might avoid seeing because we're angry, those we might overlook because their poverty of spirit makes us uncomfortable, those we think are beneath us are the very ones Christ might use us to be His voice calling their name. As His skin representatives He desires for us to reach out to the lost, to fellowship with the invisible, and to disciple new believers, looking past their pasts to what they can become in the hands of a holy, all powerful God. We don't want to lose God's people because they remain invisible and unheard within the church. We don't want to lose people because we have never given them the opportunity to live down their pasts. After all, in light of the bigness of our God aren't we all  Zacchaeus's? I praise God for the instant change in Zacchaeus and personally believe he, the wee little man, walked a bit taller the day Jesus invited Himself to dinner.

When feelings and lies from the past return and I find myself tempted to shrink in shame I remind myself that Jesus knew my name. I rejoice in the fact that Jesus and sought me out! Then and only then can I square my shoulders, walk a bit taller, prepare for battle, and walk in victory.
 

Prayer: Father, sometimes when we have heard a story over and over, we fail to see the lessons You would have us learn. Open our eyes to Your truth even in the stories we learned in our youth. Thank you for choosing us and reaching out to us when we are caught up in sin. Thank you for saving people even when we behave like Pharisees, tax collectors, and wee little people. Thank you for seeing us, for calling us by name, and being a God who redeems. Thank you for the way You have revealed yourself to us even though our sin has tainted our lives. Thank you for maintaining the vision of what You have created us to be. Help us to love the unloved people for Christ. Amen.