Overwhelming Fear

"For I, the LORD your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, 

"Fear not, I am the one who helps you.””

Isaiah 41:13

Fear is an interesting emotion in that it can be both rational and irrational. I have several fears I believe are rational and protective. I am terrified of rattle snakes and that fear kept me alive when we lived in an area where there was rattle snakes. I am also afraid of riding in a car with someone who has been drinking, walking alone after dark, and afraid of heights. Okay…as I am writing this I am also realizing that the fears I thought were rational aren’t always rational. My fear of rattle snakes has grown to include all snakes, even those that are harmless. My fear of riding in a car has grown to irrational proportions and I often brake my imaginary break and scream, “STOP!” at my husband. My fear of heights has become irrational after I suffered a broken ankle and a broken knee and have realized that I am not quite as stable on my feet. I have also had irrational fears of the dark and public speaking, but have worked on them some.

I’ve had other fears that were situational. One bout with fear occurred when one of our sons was in an accident and his spleen ruptured. There were no words to describe the fear that I felt when they wheeled him into surgery. I was afraid I wouldn’t see him again and afraid of the pain that would bring. I was afraid of the lowered resistance to infection that he would have without a spleen and afraid of seeing him in so much pain. But I prayed and faced those fears with God and He truly was with me. His presence was huge and looming even though the truth that His sovereignty determined the outcome, which thankfully was positive.

I was also overwhelmed with fear when our granddaughter came thirteen weeks early. I was afraid she wouldn’t make it and got on a plane not knowing if I would get to see her when I got there. I was afraid I would never know what her voice and laughter would sound like. I was afraid I would never have the privilege of seeing what her personality is like. I was afraid I would never know what could make her smile, cry, or jump for joy and I prayed and again experienced God’s overwhelming presence and again was blessed by joy of seeing her overcome the odds and had the joy of hearing her sing, laugh, cry, and wine. I had the joy of seeing her this last weekend play with her cousins, dance beautifully, draw, and run this last weekend as we celebrated her fifth birthday. Every time I look at our son or granddaughter I am reminded of a season of intense intimacy I experienced as I talked honestly to God about my fears, my belief, my unbelief, my desires, my hopes, and admitted the powerlessness that terrified me.

I was overwhelmed with fear when our sons faced deployments in war zones. To wake up daily knowing they were in harm’s way is different kind of scary for which no one prepared me. I think those who have had loved ones killed or wounded in the line of duty have even more fears to face than I can even imagine. The deployments and a few other situations have been what I have called, the fear of the what “ifs.” They loom, but they don’t seem valid, because we don’t know if we will have to face them or not. Sometimes it is hard to share those kinds of things, because people don’t get them and we feel alone. But the truth is God is with us and will help us face whatever the outcome is and it is okay to talk about them.

I have watched some precious people deal with huge fears when the outcomes weren’t so positive. They lost jobs, spouses, children, marriages they wanted to keep, and homes their families have lived in for years. I have wondered what kind of fears they face when they have to provide for their families on no income. What kinds of fears surface when a widow or widower enters the house for the first time without their loved one and have to face their first night alone in a bed they once shared? What kind of fear looms over the parents who have had to lay such tiny beings to rest? What kind of fears do those betrayed by divorce have to overcome to find their joy again? What kinds of fears do those who lose their homes face? What kinds of fears loom on the horizon while a person waits on a medical test or gets back a test that is positive for cancer?

I used to feel a great amount of shame for the fear that I experience and that shame drove me away from God when I needed to cling to Him the most. I have heard some people say that fear is a lack of faith. I don’t agree with that. I think that fear is an opportunity to exercise faith as we take Him at His word and choose to cling to the truth of verses like the one above. I think that fear is a normal part of life and an opportunity to develop rich intimacy with God as we tell Him the truth about our fears, longings, and desires, and learn to trust His sovereignty.

Fear is personal in that we all have different things that trigger fear and we all respond to it and feel it’s intensity in different ways. We can choose to stuff it and never learn from it or we can acknowledge it to God and to safe people and move through it and learn from it. We do have some power over the fear in that we can choose to intensify it or decompress it by what we think about in regard to the fearful situations. What a gracious God we have. He tells us so much in that one verse: He is our God! He holds our right hand! He speaks directly to our hearts! We don’t have to fear, because He is the one who helps us. There is not a fear too big for Him to handle. He doesn’t promise to rescue us from every fearful situation…but He does promise to help us. When I am faced with the next fearful situation, I close my eyes and focus on Him so I can feel His hand in mine and I will listen for His voice to say, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.” May we never forget that it is God who holds our right hands and speaks hope into our hearts as we face fearful situations.

Prayer: Father, thank you for promising to be with us every moment of every day. Thank you for speaking hope into our lives when we are afraid. Thank you for promising to help us through everything that we face. We love you and want to honor you even in the midst of our fear. Amen.

Loving Like Jesus

“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.”

John 15:12

According to the Old Testament, we are to love the Lord God with all of our hearts, minds, souls, and might. We are also to love our neighbors as ourselves. I have never been sure what that kind of love really looks like. Then one day I realized the above commandment Jesus gave tells us how we can begin to fulfill the Old Testament command. Essentially, the verse in John tells us to look at how Jesus loves and to use that as a standard for loving. It’s clear from both His words and actions that Jesus loved His heavenly Father, loved His friends, loved strangers, and loved Himself. It is also clear He loved His enemies.

What did Jesus’ love look like? It looked like spending time with His Father in prayer. It looked like trusting His Father even in the midst of storms, mistreatment, rejection, false accusations, and difficult tasks. It looked like resisting temptation. It looked like teaching, admonishing, and exhorting others. It looked like touching the untouchable. It looked like healing the sick, the lame, the blind, and the deaf. It looked like spending time with children, sinners, and the outcast. It looked like casting demons out of the souls of men. It looked like crossing cultural, gender, economical, and spiritual boundaries to invite all who would come, into a relationship with Him. It looked like being social and partying with friends. It looked like sharing openly His heart and seeking others where they were at. It looked like wrestling so hard He sweat blood over God’s will of the cross and His own desire to avoid it. It looked like choosing to obey His Father even in that severe state of angst so that He could reconcile us to Himself, which is in essence loving His enemies.

When we think of Jesus’ enemies, we tend to think of Satan, the Pharisees, those who mistreated Him, lied about Him, and who put Him to death. But, according to Romans 5:10, we were all enemies of God before we were reconciled to Him through Jesus. That’s such a sobering thought. If Jesus considered you and I His enemies when He chose the cross on our behalf, what right do we have to refuse to love those we call enemies? If we’re serious about loving as He loves, we must identify our enemies and choose to love them. They’re the people that aren’t for us, but are stand against us and the ministries we do. They’re the people who glare daggers through our hearts every time they see us. They’re the abusers who rob us of innocence or left bruises on both our bodies and our hearts. They’re those who criticize us, wounding us to the core of our being with harsh words. They’re those who refuse to see us, withholding love and compassion from us. They’re those who isolate us through slander or who kill or rob our joy on a daily basis. They’re those in positions of God-given authority who use their position to do great harm to those they should protect. Some even consider God an enemy. But, sadly, for many of us, our worst enemies are ourselves.

We must realize is that every person we hate is a person Jesus radically loved unto death. That same Spirit that loved you and I unto death indwells us and can empower us to love as He loves. The Spirit gives us the capacity to radically love when it’s humanly impossible to do so. It requires we bask in His love and choose to allow Him to love through us. As we are open to His working in our hearts and our lives we will become able to love with His love–and that is a love that knows absolutely no bounds. Have you allowed God to penetrate your heart with His pure and radical love? Is His love a reality in your everyday life? Does it help shape your attitudes, thoughts and actions? Does it overflow to those around you? Is it big enough to encompass your enemies?

Prayer: Father, thank you for loving us with your great love. Help us to meditate on it and let it shape our thoughts, attitudes, actions, and emotions. Help us to bask in the joy of knowing that we have always been, are now, and always will be radically, irrevocable, and eternally loved. Give us the desire to love like you have loved us. Give us humility and grace to see others as You see them. Give us wisdom in how to love in a way that invites others to more fully live in you light. Amen.

Your Fruit or God’s Fruit?

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, self-control; against such there is not law."

Galatians 5:22-23

The last three “fruits of the Spirit” are virtues that seem to affect a person's heart while having the potential to spill over into the relationships they have with both God and others.

Faithfulness is from a Greek word that implies being reliable and trustworthy. It is the same word as used of the faithful servant in Luke 16:10-12. This could look like the repeated fulfillment of commitments that we have made to people. It could also include following through in even the smallest of things. It could also reflect faithfulness in our personal worship and quiet times with the Lord and our being faithful to corporate worship. It could extend even to faithfulness to God at those times when no one is watching us and we are faithful simply because we love Him.

The second word in the list is meekness. It marks a person who submits to God's word and is also gentle in their dealings with other people. That would be true in a situation where a person is called to comfort or encourage someone else. It can even be in a situation that calls for confrontation or discipline. It is when a person is gentle in the face of irritation or anger. We need to realize that gentleness is a characteristic that invites people to be transparent and vulnerable and often opens up many ministry opportunities. Gentleness in confrontation is possible when we realize that we are called to speak the truth in a loving way. We can do that when we are confident that it is God's spirit and His kindness that will lead the person to repent. Peter also mentions that God treasures a gentile quiet spirit in a woman. Meekness in no way is a reflection of weak people. It comes from a word that implies great power that is under control. In the face of adversity or in the middle of a confrontation that may not be going well, it takes more strength to remain gracious, gentle, and firm than it does to simply give in to the temptation to blow up in anger?

The last character trait of the fruit of the spirit is self-control. It is a word that denotes self-mastery and no doubt primarily relates to us being able to curb our fleshly impulses. This could include any of the physical appetites we have. Some of us can relate to fighting the urge to eat a whole pan of brownies. Some of us have been tempted to drink a friend's milkshake after you drank our own. Some of us have had to fight hard against the temptation to give in to sex outside of marriage. Some of us have to fight the urge to look down on others. Ironically, of our body is alive, we will be faced with the urge to respond in some way to our flesh on a daily basis. The flesh unfortunately will be with us until the day that we die. At the times that we don’t allow God to rule our fleshly appetites they will most likely be out of control and we fall prey to things like lust, gluttony, drinking, and self-promoting behaviors. However, when we are controlled by the Holy Spirit our fleshly appetites will be under control and we will use them in a way that promotes health, is not selfish, and is not self destructive. Even at our weakest points, His strength will be manifested in us and through us as long as we have our hearts turned toward Him.

We need to realize we can manifest “fake fruit” for a while. That means we can maintain behaviors that seem reflect any or all of the fruit in our lives, but we are essentially just “white knuckling it.” If it is produced in our own power it will have a tendency to create pride and be more of a self-righteousness that a God righteousness. As "the fruit of the spirit” is produced in us through God’s Spirit, He will get the glory and our lives will reflect His love to others and we will possess a humble heart. It is also important for us to realize that while it is God's job to produce His character in us, it is our job to participate in the process of cultivation or the fruit won’t happen. As we spend time with God in His word, praying, worshipping, and fellowshipping with other Christians we need to be listening to the Holy Spirit as He tries to weed out what is not holy or what is choking the fruit. Fruit is always produced so that it may be "eaten" and there are people around us who are in need of a taste of the goodness of God and the sweetness of His character. Psalm 34:8 says, "O taste and see that the Lord is good, how blessed is the man that takes refuge in him." When people are around you will they get a taste of the goodness of God or a taste of pride and self-righteousness? Will they experience His character and be drawn to Him or feel judged? Which of the fruit is lacking in your own life? What can you do to help the cultivation process?

Prayer: Father, we thank you for the Holy Spirit's presence in our lives and for the "fruit" He produces in our lives. Help us to be pliable and allow you to cultivate your character in us. May our lives reflect you and honor you in all that we do and say. Help us to be people who allow others to taste of your fruit in our lives so that they will see your perfect goodness and desire intimacy with you in ever increasing depths. Amen.

Longsuffering, Gentleness, and Goodness

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness…"

Galatians 5:22

The first three qualities of the fruit of the Spirit are the Spirit’s productions of Godly character in us. These three qualities are interrelated. For instance, when we experience God's unconditional love we will experience joy. We will also develop the characteristic of peace and it will be a peace beyond our understanding in that it, too, will remain intact despite our circumstances. We cultivate all three of these characteristics by cultivating our relationship with God.

The next three qualities listed in the fruit of the spirit are longsuffering, gentleness, and kindness. They are all characteristics that are going to be visible as we interact and relate with other people. Long-suffering is courageous endurance through difficult situations and difficult relationships. Another definition said it was forbearance under provocation. That means being patient with someone when they are irritating or frustrating us. It carries the idea of being patient when you hear water dripping and can't get it to quit. Two extreme examples of this popped in to my head when I read that. One was when Christ was on the cross and when Stephen was being stoned. Both of them prayed for those killing them. Christ had every right to come off the cross and wipe out everyone, but His love kept Him there; compelling Him to pray for those crucifying Him. Steven, through the Holy Spirit was able to adopt the love and the longsuffering that Christ had and echoed His prayer for the men stoning Him.

Gentleness is the second fruit listed that is exhibited through relationships. It is simply being kind toward others. Christ displayed that in his dealings with people. He was kind to the adulterous woman who was brought to him. He was kind to the blind man He had given sight to when He sought him out after the religious leaders had confronted the man. He was kind to a leper that He had healed by His touch. He was kind to children that flocked to Him. He was gentle with the woman who was bleeding for 12 years and reached out and touched Him. He showed Mary kindness by defending her when others criticized her for anointing Him with expensive oil. He showed kindness to His mother, Mary, as He was hanging on the cross by asking his disciple to care for her. He showed Peter kindness by seeking him out after he had denied Christ three times.

Goodness is the last of the fruits that is visible through our relationships. It is essentially love in action. It has an implication of uprightness and is love expressed with pure motives and righteousness. It carries with it the indication of reaching out to others to do good even when they do not deserve it. In Acts 9 we find a lady named Dorcas who lived in Joppa. She was described as a woman who was abounding with deeds of kindness and charity, which she continually did. She had quite a ministry to widows and made them clothes and coats. They grieved her death so hard that Peter raised her from the dead.

These three fruits are of course produced in us through the Holy Spirit and that happens in us as a result of our growing relationship with Him. Because they are God's characteristics it is should be reemphasized that each of those character traits should be there whether the person or people we are relating to deserve it. Christ does not stop being kind, patient or good when we blow it or none of us would be here. We also want to remember that kindness and goodness does include confronting and working through conflict in a godly way. Many of us have behavioral patterns and defense mechanisms that have followed us from our pre-Christian days. As we listen to the Spirits guidance we will find more godly and mature ways of dealing with hurtful people that enhances relationships and helps us grow.

We need to let God change us from the inside out so that our actions and reactions are Godly and are representative of the character of God, especially when those people we are dealing with are difficult. We are to reflect the love of God towards them just as Christ did us. That can be very hard when we are facing someone who hates us. When that happens we want to stop and think about what it is that we desire the most. When the ugly and most hateful parts of our hearts rise to the surface we know that we don't deserve to be loved. Yet, that is when we long the most to have someone put their arms around us and tell us they love us. Christ has loved us like that and we are to be His living epistle and to extend that same love and goodness to others.

Is there relational fruit evident in our lives? Are we longsuffering with those people who get on our nerves? Are we gentlewomen not just in times of peace, but even in the face of confrontation and conflict? Are we good to those who don't deserve it? Again all of these characteristics will only be produced through the Holy Spirit; we cannot muster them up. Is there anything in our lives that might prevent His fruit from being evident in us? Are we willing to lay those things aside so others can see Christ in us and glorify God.

Prayer: Father, thank you for Your Holy Spirit and Your grace in producing Godly character in us that enhances our relationship with you and with other people. Help us to truly experience your love, joy, and peace so that we can show patience, goodness and kindness to others. Amen.

His Joy in Us

"This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh…But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy,…"
Galatians 5:16,22

It is so freeing to understand that the fruit of the spirit is not something that we can muster up, it is the characteristics that the Holy Spirit develops in us as we walk with Him in an intimate relationship. To me, an intimate relationship includes reading God's word, praying about my response to what I have read, worshiping, and choosing to walk in obedience to Him. It would also include being very present in life and noticing exactly what God is doing in me, around me, and through me. When we experience God's love we are filled with His love and able to respond by loving Him and other people. Joy is similar in that it is born out of a deep, trusting relationship with God. It, just like love, is a work of the Holy Spirit in our lives. Joy is not necessarily happiness, excitement, or pleasurable emotions that we so often search for. It is a steady feeling of contentment and trust that is not based on our circumstances. It may evoke other feelings that overflow into tears of joy or laughter that we experience as we are broken or excited by what God is doing. The joy can be present in positive situations like weddings, births, baptisms or hearing a believer’s testimony. It can also be experienced in extremely difficult circumstances like rejection, sickness and death. I have had a couple of friends who always praise God when I share something difficult I am going through, because they know that it will produces growth in me.

Several years ago, one of my best friends got married and excitedly began her family. Their first pregnancy ended in miscarriage and then her second baby died of an accidental suffocation at six months of age. She got pregnant right away with twins only to have one of the twins die in her womb. She had to lie in bed for a month to give the surviving baby a chance to survive while hoping it would not get an infection. They learned tremendous lessons about God and His love for them as our church family surrounded them and supported them through the grief process. People were saved and drawn closer to God as a result of what they went through. They grieved deeply, but there was hope in the midst of their grief that was beautiful to behold. They had the same deep hurt, questions, guilt and anger that anyone in their circumstances would have, but because of their relationship with God they could pour their hearts out to Him. They had a deep assurance of God's abiding love constantly bathing them and they had joy because they chose to believe in His goodness, faithfulness and love even in the face of the losses they experienced. It was because of their choice to cling to God that the Holy Spirit was free to fill them with His joy even in the midst of the deep pain they were feeling.

There are several things that rob us of our joy. One robber is not knowing God's word or even more importantly not knowing God. Another joy robber would be having a distorted view of what the Christian life is supposed to be. We are never promised a problem free life in this world, however we are promised that God will never leave us or forsake us and that He will work all circumstances for our good. Another joy robber is basing our worth on people’s opinion of us rather than God’s. Another joy robber we face is the misconception that Christians don’t experience painful emotions like sadness, anger, frustration, guilt and confusion. If we believe we have to hide those emotions and don't talk to God or other Christians about them our joy is blocked. It is important to know that God's desire is for us to be full of joy (John 16:24). It is just as important to know that joy comes through a transparent relationship with God and His people as we go through painful circumstances. By that I mean bring our hearts and our questions to the light. When God in His sovereignty and love allows deep hurt to occur, we have to believe and trust that if we will keep walking with Him we will experience His love at a deep enough level to turn that pain to joy. (Jeremiah 31:13). Lastly the last joy robber is our own rebellion. When we sin we make a conscience choice to turn away from God. If we continue in a sin, we will feel like God has deserted us. Part of that is due to the fact that we feel guilty and begin to justify our sin and turn off the guilt. As we harden our hearts that part of us that senses and experiences God is numbed. If we continue in the sin God remains with us, but the hardness of our own hearts and possibly our unbelief prevents us from experiencing Him in order to make us so hungry for Him that we will give up the sin. Psalm 51:12 is an example of David crying out to God to restore the joy of his salvation following confession.

The questions we need to ask ourselves is do we trust God enough to be open and honest with Him? Do we believe in our heart that it is okay to take our doubts, anger, hurt and questions to God? Do we trust Him enough in all circumstances to ask Him to change our sadness into joy? Do we really believe it is His desire for us to experience great joy? Life can be really hard, but there is joy in being a child of God and not having to do it alone.

Prayer: Father, I thank you for people like Paul in the Bible and the different friends You have given me who have walked faithfully with you through very painful circumstances. Seeing You produce joy in the middle of their pain has strengthened my faith tremendously and helped me to hold on when it was hard to do so. Lord, please help each one of us be transparent with you. Please show us what to do with the uncomfortable emotions we experience, especially our anger, hurt, confusion, and doubt. As we grow in our faith through that transparency please develop in us spirits full of your joy! Amen.

The Wounded Healer

“But he was wounded for our transgressions; He was crushed for our iniquities; Upon Him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with His stripes we are healed.”

Isaiah 53:5

What do we do with the question of pain? So many of us question God because of the pain we experienced or the pain our loved ones endured. Many of us have been deeply wounded by abuse and as a result we became expert pretenders, living in denial, repressing memories, and stuffing the emotions that surrounded the painful events of our pasts. Many of us were wounded by others and believe something in us wasn't worthy of God’s protection and we find it difficult to turn to Him for the healing we desperately want and need. It is imperative that we understand the truth that God never promised us a pain-free life in this world. For us to respond to God’s love with love, He had to give each of us the freedom to choose and sadly, Adam and Eve's choices resulted in us living in a sinful, pain-filled world. It also resulted in each of us being born with the potential to do great evil. Because of this, we often struggle with toxic shame as we live with the consequences of our own sin, as well as the traumatizing consequences of other people's sin.

The verse above makes it clear that Jesus understands our pain. He was stripped and beaten until He was bruised and bleeding and then hung between heaven and earth for all to see. He understands what it feels like to bear consequences of others' sins for as He hung there our sin was laid upon Him. He knows what it feels like to be blamed for what another has done, because He took our blame as He bore our shame. He knows what it feels like to be condemned, being condemned in our place. He knows what it feels like to feel crushed and wounded, for He was crushed for our sin. He also knows what it feels like to be falsely accused, to be misunderstood, and to be despised for simply being Himself. He even understands how it feels to be alone as His friends ran and His heavenly Father didn’t even intervene. He understands what it is like to be used as many seek His gifts rather than the Giver. He knows what betrayal feels like, because a disciple betrayed Him with a kiss. 

Only Jesus loved enough to choose to experience abuse, pain, and shame on our behalf and He has the understanding, the compassion, and the power to heal hearts that are deeply wounded by abuse of any kind. The verse above reveals that He didn’t just come to pay for our sin, He came to heal us. We falsely believe that others can heal us. We falsely believe that if our abusers, those who betrayed us, and those who neglected us, or those who sinned against us apologized, we would be healed. While an apology may validate our story and can pave the way for restoration, it cannot mend a heart torn by betrayal. It cannot ease the anxiety triggered by overwhelming powerlessness. It cannot calm the fear that trauma evoked. Nor, can it fill a love-starved heart. I have known people who think they can’t be healed until they get an apology, but that isn't true. Nor did it automatically restore trust; that came through hard work, speaking truth, setting godly boundaries, and giving grace upon grace.

It is humbling to really get honest with God about the pain we have experienced, about the anger we have often buried deep, and the lack of grace we are giving to others. I was fortunate enough to pour out the pain in my heart to Him in the presence of godly people I trusted. I have asked God questions, some of which He has answered and some of which He hasn’t. At times I have wrestled with the ambivalence I felt over what seemed like inaction on His part and He kept drawing me back to the Easter Story. To know my Creator understands the pain I experienced and the sin I sinned and chose willingly to suffer that kind of pain for me so I could have a relationship with Him blows my mind. To know that He sees me, to know that He hears me, and to know that He understands even the feelings of my infirmities means so much to me. It was through the fellowship of suffering that I learned so much about His heart and HIs love for us. That was the precious gift that came from the dark I experienced. I don't want to ever forget that the Lion of Judah first came as the Wounded Healer. 

Prayer: Father, help us to have the courage to look at the painful places in our hearts and in our lives. Provide people to hear our stories and to help us connect with God at a deep enough level that those painful places can be healed. Remind us often that you get us and understand what we go through. Thank you for dying in our place and not just redeeming us, but healing us. Amen.

Godly Fruit

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is not law." Galatians 5:22-23

What kind of fruit is produced in my life? Is it the sweet precious character of God that is produced? I know that an intimate relationship with Christ will change my heart and enable me to produce spiritual fruit and godly characteristics in us. The first character trait on the list above is love. I have shared before that when I heard a sermon on loving God with all of our hearts, minds, souls, and strength, and to love our neighbor as ourselves that I asked God to teach me to love Him with all that I am. I didn't understand at the time what a love that was so encompassing looked like. I had believed the concept of God being more of an angry and distant Father than an Abba or personal Daddy. Because of that, I expected His answer to come in the form of admonitions. However, for over 4 weeks I was overwhelmed by daily lessons about His love for me. They came in the form of the Scriptures, sermons, books, encouragement, emails, praise music, and life events.

One of the most important lessons He teaches us is that our loving depends on the fact that He first loved us. It is only as we experience His love that we can begin to understand how to love Him and how to love others. I Corinthians 13 gives us a really clear picture of what godly love looks like. It is patient and kind, does not envy, does not boast, is not rude, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no records of wrong, and does not delight in evil. It rejoices in the truth and seeks to protect, trust, hope and perseveres until the very end. It is not like the love our society has which is often selfish and manipulative and wanes when things get tough or the brain chemistry changes. God's love satisfies the love hunger in each of our hearts.

In loving us, God took the initiative. He demonstrated His love for us when we were His enemies and while we were still in bondage to our sin. He did this by sending Christ to live on earth and to die in our place for the sins we have committed. Christ invited sinners to live and walk with Him and many of them came. Even in His perfect holiness, something in Him invited them to live transparent lives before Him. When they had doubts they told Him. When they were prideful, they did not hide it. When they sinned they did it openly and He exhorted them to grow.

He demonstrated eternal love in that He loved in the face of adversity and hatred. He chose to love when in His humanity it caused Him great pain to do so. I wonder if we are really willing to walk with Him in such an intimate way that we can take the risk to initiate that kind of sacrificial love with others? Can we love in the face of hatred and adversity? Can we love when it hurts to do so?

We can't ever lose sight of the fact that loving God and loving people is intricately intertwined. Matthew 25 tells us that when we love people by meeting their needs we are actually demonstrating our love to God. We are also called to love non-Christians like He does – even while they are lost in their sin. We are called to love our enemies just like He did. John 13:34 gives us a new commandment to love others not as we love ourselves, but as He loves us.

Remember from the vine lesson that we can’t produce the fruit of the spirit ourselves. God produces it in us. No matter how hard we try we will never be able to muster a sacrificial godly love on our own. There will be times that we are too tired or too sick to have anything to give. There will be times that we are just too human and selfish to love as He loves, but He will produce it in us. I have been on mission trips in areas of Mexico where the dirt and the smells were hard to handle and yet have been able to hold and weep with hurting women. I had the privilege of holding a baby sick with aids even with the fear that disease evokes. I have been able to share the gospel when I felt timid and overwhelmed by the barriers of language, culture, experiences, and economic differences. I was able to teach in spite of extremely painful headaches and exhaustion.

I honestly don't understand this love thing. It will always be a mystery to me. I can walk into a room simply out of obedience with nothing to give, only to have God fill be with a passionate love that wells up from deep inside and compels me to do what is unnatural for me. I may wipe away a stranger's tears, share Christ boldly or exhort a stranger in a strange land to cling to God who loved them enough to have died for them…but then there are days I walk by a homeless person unwilling to make eye contact and pushing down harsh judgments of which I am ashamed. I hope we all learn to sit at Christ's feet and experienced His love at a level deep enough that it compels us to love Him through obedience and to love others sacrificially in ways that are not natural for us.

Prayer: Father, thank you for your love and for giving us the ability to love you and other people through your Holy Spirit. Fill us with your passion and the desire to love sacrificially and consistently. Fill us with you love and the fruit of Your holy Spirit. Amen.